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Real. Raw. And Forgiveness.

G'mornin to ya!

I pray all is well with you. Hopefully, you had a restful, recharging weekend. But if not, I pray that for you today!

My weekend was productive! My beloved and I did a lot of yard work Saturday. This was also his 65th birthday! I am so happy and blessed he was born! I celebrate this amazing Marine of mine daily!

For whatever reason, this morning, my heart is so heavy! Emotions are full and seeping down my face.

Some of it is related to what today represents!

I hate this holiday! Passionately!!

Anything or anyone that sits against our Heavenly Abba God will be made low! Our Heavenly Father is a jealous God. And He does not want His children harmed.

Yet, we clearly see our precious children, young and old alike, hurt!!! Sometimes even their very lives are stolen! I just can't believe our Abba is pleased with this!

Years ago, my beloved helped me navigate a hard season. I'd escaped an abusive relationship, and oftentimes I'd spout out how I'd like to see that person hurting as badly as I was at the time! Beloved kept telling me, vengeance is mine, says the Lord'!

I didn't wanta hear that because to me, it sounded as if that person would get away with all the years of hurt! I felt strongly that person needed to pay and pay dearly!

(Boy, it's a good thing I'm not in charge of random lightning bolts! I know a few I might let slip toward some folks! 😊)

I was wrong!

I didn't need to focus my energy on retribution but on forgiveness! Geeze....that's a biggie!

For me, forgiveness is hard!

That doesn't excuse me from doing so. I believe it simply means I need Jesus to help me have the 'want to' to forgive! I mean, really, what am I truly doing? It's like I'm taking poison, hoping the other person gets sick! That's just not too smart!

So today, I am emotional and weepy!I

I'm leaning in to my Poppa God for His special healing touch on my tired and wounded soul!

What that looks like for me ...I put on some worship music and get still. I'm learning to be raw and nakked before my Poppa. He already knows my heart! As I pour out my heart to Him either silently or out loud, I always sense Him right here with me! That reminds me I am not alone!!

For whatever reason, this morning, I've been reminded that my mother often spoke of how she wished I'd never been born! Have mercy....that cuts deep! That, I believe, brings on a spirit of rejection!

I know that the words we speak have the power of life and death! That's in the Word!

However, when reading God's Word, I know I am not rejected! Actually, I am wanted and celebrated by my Heavenly Father! He knew me even before He formed me in my mother's womb!! Wow...that's in the Word too!

So today, this morning, I will sit with my emotions! I will feel them instead of shoving them in a box only to pretend they don't exist! I will feel them and I will ask my Jesus to be right there in the middle of it all! And I know He will bring healing! He always does when we ask! ,

Today I receive His healing and comfort!

I pray if there are any wounded areas in your heart, you, too, that if there are any wounded areas in your heart, you will also will receive Abba's love and healing touch!

May you have a wonderfully blessed day!!

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